The Impotence of Being Nickolaus

In his latest whinefest, attention whoring, incoherent rambling, Nickistiltskin regales us with his latest bad idea: his new full length non fiction piece (of tripe). Two artists came forward to wanting to illustrate the book, I’m not sure wanting to cover it in graffiti rife with penises is the same thing, but hey, it’s his…

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Getting Submissions The Pacione Way

First, you start by posting a self pic giving the camera your stubby middle finger. Follow this up by making a face as if you just pooped your pants. Third, make sure it’s so low res that it appears blurry and blotchy (though in this case, it’s an improvement). Since he’ll scream if I use…

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Leave Ablert Alone!

Yes, the spelling on Albert was intentional, as that’s how Nikita once spelled his own middle name on one of his poorly formatted, unreadable pile of printing he calls a book. I got an email from a friend, a non writer , I might add, asking why it is I keep picking on Pacione.  “He’s…

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How To Be A Professional The Pacione Way!

In a response to something I posted on his blog, La Femme Nikita responded with this: I am not a liar or a fraud. I just don’t publish the faggot nor will I read works from the faggot. I strongly make this suggestion, please refrain from trying to stop people from submitting to my anthologies….

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Love, Nikita Style

[youtube=http://youtu.be/uNHuI0Pw0m8] Nikita, I appreciate your unrequited love for me. I know how you must yearn for me, to the exclusion of others. While strong women obviously frighten you, you seem to have no problem making your intentions know with me. Your love letter to me via email is a perfect example. You even titled the…

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Fandom Weirdness The Conclusion (it sucks)

When last we left poor Karen Hintz, she was stuck in a self named publisher’s diner being bored to death by the sexually ambiguous Mary Sue. Fortunately, the tale comes to an end-or what passes for one in Pacione’s mind.         “They drew from Nicholas’ life for ideas.” Well that explains the…

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Fandom Weirdness Critique Part Deux (deux deux more like it)

When last we left our noble heroine Karen Hintz,  she was being propositioned by a sexually confused Mary Sue. Let’s peek in and see what happens next! I’m sure it will be uber darkity dark!         “I don’t mind having a beer.” That’s pretty much a necessity for everyone. Drink up! I’ll…

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Fandom Weirdness by Nickolaus Pacione – A Critique Part 1

I also could have called this “Everything I’ve ignored in Strunk & White is in this bowel movement of a story” and be just as accurate. While the entire piece is 6200 words (but feels a good deal longer), I’m going to concentrate on the first page for now. There’s only so much I can…

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